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Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Personal Commitment

In this world of instant gratification, high speed technology and a 'quick fix' mentality it seems that many people have abdicated responsibility for taking care of themselves. This is evidenced by the growing obesity rate, the rise in substance abuse and even the number of stress related dis-eases that take their toll every year. These may include high blood pressure, heart disease/attacks, diabetes and lung disease from smoking.

In my practice I've worked with many people, whose first words are, "I'm here, fix me"! My response is always the same, "I don't have a magic wand and I can't make you do anything that you don't want to do". As a counselor and coach, I guide people to venture into their own inner awareness, to touch the 'wise one' deep inside (the subconscious mind) and offer suggestions that can help them implement change. The rest is up to the client. There must be a personal commitment to do the work necessary to achieve their goals. People need to have a true desire for evolution and growth in their lives.

Many people know something is wrong or lacking in their lives but they are so out of touch with their higher self, the issue(s) cannot even be verbalized. They may say, "I just can't put my finger on it", or a phrase similar. They may be quite clear about what they don't want but in many cases have no real idea about what they do want, and it is this dilemma that leads to confusion and inaction. Even when they believe they are clear and say they are coming for weight management or smoking cessation it is often something much deeper that emerges once the 'inner' work begins.

Unfortunately, many people fear delving to deeply and don't really want to change. This can show up as a myriad of excuses and self-sabotage. Sometimes old clichés surface (which are usually a product of much earlier conditioning) i.e. "better the devil you know, than the devil you don't". Change is frightening to many, because people are creatures of habit and prefer what is familiar, even when it is counter-productive to what they 'say' is wanted. For example, a person weighing 250 pounds may 'say' "I want to get down to 175" and then proceed to 'do' everything to sabotage getting those results. They may continue to overeat at mealtime, sit in front of the TV or computer snacking all day or just never get around to exercising.

The reason(s) for the disruption between intention and reality are usually deeply rooted in the subconscious mind and that is where they need to be addressed to produce lasting change. It's the conscious mind that 'says' what is wanted or desired, but it's the subconscious where habits, behaviours and emotions are housed and therefore, where any blockages need to be cleared. Until both parts of the mind are on the same page, any changes that are accomplished are generally short term (this may sound familiar if you've ever made a New Year's resolution).

"It takes a big person to accept full responsibility for
 their own happiness. It takes an even bigger person to accept
 full responsibility for their own unhappiness".

Quote from Mike Dooley - Founder of  http://www.tut.com/
 ~ a great inspirational website ~

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